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Some of the unwanted event items could be due to lag. Not everyone knows the trick about updating the names by adding the "Test" user as a neighbor. I have gotten in the habit of doing this trick every time before I start to send out gifts from my main account.

Sometimes through the slip of a finger I have sent gifts back to a support/NoGift account. If someone does that very rarely then I would assume it was an error. If they do it regularly then I agree that there's no excuse.

If I have a trading partner who I know is liable to just send back I make sure that I only send them something I'd like in return!  If I get a rare send-back from someone who usually pays attention to requests then I figure it was a slip of the finger, and I don't let it bother me.